Jennifer Egan

Love in the Time of No Time

Jennifer Egan article on explosion in world of Internet dating; in first half of 2003, Americans spent $214.3 million on personals and dating sites, with 40 million visiting at least one dating site in a month; some sites use complex algorithms to match people and others are simple listing services; first generation to come of age on Internet are now young adults and using Web to find everything they need, but fair number of people continue to feel stigma about online dating; key to sytem is personal profile, always available in queue of romantic prospects, and constantly being tweaked with newer, more flattering data and photos; search can lead to online flirting and perhaps in-person contact, where couple may or may not have chemistry, sometimes resulting in polite e-mail rejecting further dates; some sites exist simply for those who desire to meet for casual sexual encounters; people disillusioned with online dating say its promise of no-muss relationship attracts people with intimacy and commitment problems; issues of jealousy come up around people who continue to post profiles while they are dating; one couple's experience detailed; photos (L)